The Wolf Survives
by KiraLex
Summary: It's been 9 years since Helgrim Frost-Blood disappeared at the end of the war. Thought to be a myth to some, he is a very real person in his daughter's eyes. Though she has been told that her father died that day on the battlefield, Lifa refuses to believe it. She has become an adventurer in her own right and when she discovers a well-used journal, she starts to understand.


Chapter 1

4E 215

Lifa finished strapping the belt around her waist before looking over her shoulder at the woman standing there watching her as she finished her preparations. She rolled her eyes with a sigh and shook her head as Aunt Iddra continued to lecture her. This was nothing new to Lifa, ever since she had started following the path of an adventurer two years ago her aunt had been this way. It didn't matter that she was never truly alone. She always went out with her uncle Fjolnar and "uncle" Jax. Her aunt never liked the idea of her putting herself in such danger, but Lifa had never been one to shrink away from anything. Especially since she was a little five-year-old girl who was being told her father fought valiantly, but in the end had given his life in the final battle of the civil war. She remembered her father, which was more than she could say about her mother who died after giving birth to her, and she knew that Helgrim Frost-Blood was something of a folk hero around Kynesgrove. When she was five and heard about her father, she stood tall and looked at her uncle Fjolnar and simply hugged him. There were no tears, no whining. She accepted what had happened to her father, to many fathers during the war. However, she didn't believe that her father had died that day. She wasn't sure why, but she had a feeling deep inside that had stayed with her throughout her childhood to this day telling her he was alive.

She learned early on to not say anything about it, though. Whenever she brought it up, Aunt Iddra would break down and cry which meant Uncle Fjolnar would glare at her for causing such things to happen. After that happened a few times, she kept it to herself and let everyone else think that she had believed that her father had died at the battle. Though inside, that feeling that he was alive never went away. More than one night she had dreamed of a great white wolf with beautiful blue eyes. In these dreams, she talks to the wolf about her father and every time she wakes up, she gets the feeling that she had just been with him. Perhaps it was simply wishful thinking of a young girl who'd lost her father too soon, but whatever the reason, she believed he was alive. Her only issue was that if he was alive, why hadn't he returned to her? Instead she received a new "mother" in the form of Froka. Not only that, but she'd gained a little brother, apparently. Hulgar had been born seven months after her father had disappeared. Uncle Fjolnar later told her that Froka was someone her father had been spending time with during the campaign. She had no doubts that Hulgar was her brother, especially as he grew. He was just as stubborn, apparently, as her father had been. This was told to her by her other aunt, Kenna.

"Lifa Frost-Blood, I forbid you to go running off to your doom!" Iddra said, stomping her foot for emphasis.

"Auntie, you know I'm not running off to my doom and I won't be alone," Lifa said to her aunt before grabbing her quiver and put it on her back. Then she grabbed the bow and turned to look at Iddra. "It's all right, Auntie. Uncle Fjolnar and Jax won't let anything happen to me."

"That doesn't mean I don't worry for you, Lifa. And don't you think I'm not worried about Fjolnar and Jax, too, because I am. Every time you three leave I worry you won't come back, just like..."

Lifa pulled her bottom lip between her teeth and shook her head as her aunt started to weep and she knew that she had caused it by making her think of Grim again. She sighed and stepped up to Iddra and hugged her, comforting her. She would show them all, someday, that she had been right and her father hadn't died. If only she could figure out what had happened to him and what kept him from returning to them all, especially to her. Shaking her head, she leaned back and smiled at her aunt.

"It's all right, Auntie. We won't be gone long. You have my word."

"Very well, I can see that I can't stop you from going. Just... Be careful, child."

"Of course, Auntie. I never take unnecessary risks. Besides, I'll have Tilly and Meeko with me. You know they'll keep me safe."

Fjolnar had returned to Kynesgrove with the news of Grim's demise with the mare and dog with him. Meeko had been wounded during the battle and Iddra had thought at first the dog would lose his leg, but they'd managed to save it and his life. Since then, Meeko had become a part of their lives as protector, like he was thanking them for saving his life. Her father's mare, Matilda, was something else altogether. Some said it was the stress of the battles the horse had been a part of, others said it was that she was just so bonded to Grim that she had gone loco after his death, but Lifa knew better. Tilly was a war horse, not meant for living idly at a farm. She missed fighting with Grim. So Lifa had started to take her out for rides around Kynesgrove and the surrounding areas from the age of ten. More than once while she was out riding Tilly she had spotted a dark wolf in the trees, watching them. The mare would snort and pin her ears, then the wolf would move on and leave them alone. It seemed that giving Tilly a job to do was the right thing and since then she was more focused and calmer while in the pen. And Lifa was the only one she would let on her back. No one else could ride her, so that was one thing Aunt Iddra had to relent on because the horse obviously needed to be let out to run, but since no one else could do it, it would have to be Lifa.

Now that she was finished getting herself ready, she gave her aunt another hug before heading out of her room and spotting her cousin Einarr standing there, with his arms crossed and a scowl on his face, as he often had when he looked at Lifa. She rolled her eyes and pushed past him, but he reached out and held onto her arm. His eyes looked at her and his face changed from scowl to frown.

"Why must you go, Lifa? Can't you see what it does to Mama?" he asked her, his voice harsh.

"Oh stop it, Einarr, and let me go. Your father is waiting for me." She raised a brow at him after speaking, prepared to pull her arm from his grasp if she needed to, but he let her go.

"Aye, I know Papa's waitin for you," Einarr said with venom. He was angry that his parents wouldn't allow him to go on adventures, even supervised, but they'll let Lifa go. His father even encouraged her by training with her in the yard. It wasn't right and he would end it.

"Not that again, Einarr! I told you, it's not that they don't want you going. They worry about your safety. They'll see, one day, how strong you are. Be patient," she told her cousin and smiled at him.

Even as annoying as Einarr could be she knew he resented the fact that she could travel with his father and Jax, fighting off bandits and wolves, and he wasn't allowed. She also believed she was right, that they would realize that he was a man and could handle himself. She'd been working on Uncle Fjolnar whenever they went out together and was confident that soon Einarr would be asked to accompany them in training. Honestly, she felt he should have been allowed sooner, but it wasn't her place to say so.

"Oh! That armor looks so good on you, Lifa!" a voice called out and Lifa immediately froze, her heart pounding in her chest. Oh no, she had forgotten about Auntie Kenna! She put a smile on her face and turned to her father's sister.

"Auntie Kenna! Thank you, but as you know this is the same armor I have worn for some time now. You say the same thing everytime I leave. It's all right, I'll be back, Auntie." Lifa knew that Kenna did this each time because she was afraid she would disappear like her father had.

"Posh, Lifa. Hello Einarr. My, I think you grew four inches just overnight. Be a dear and see what your father wants, won't you?" Kenna said by way of sending Einarr off and giving her a few moments alone with Lifa. "I know I can't stop you from going, Lifa, but I want to just say this. Don't take risks. If you think it's dangerous, let Fjolnar or Jax take care of it, all right? You may be fourteen years old, but that doesn't mean you're an adult."

"I got it, Auntie. No unnecessary risks, not an adult. I think you hit all the major points. Oh, and you forgot don't let Tilly have her head. Honestly Auntie Kenna, you'd think I'd never done this before. I've been doing this for two years now. I am always careful and Uncle Fjolnar and Jax don't let me do something unless it's safe." Relatively, she added silently. "Now, go sit with Auntie Iddra, she needs it. I love you and I will be back in a week."

Kenna shook her head, but she had a smile on her face as she kissed her niece's cheek before heading off to sit with Iddra and the other children. Lifa left her aunts and went outside, closing her eyes and stopping for a moment as she felt the cool air. Even in the warmer months Skyrim was cool, but it was what she grew up with. She was used to it so it didn't bother her like it might have some people. Her gaze moved over to Fjolnar speaking with Einarr and she wondered what they were talking about. It soon became even stranger when she watched her cousin run back into the inn as if his feet were on fire. She shrugged and walked over to her uncle and smiled at him.

"What's going on, Uncle?"

"Ah, Lifa, there you are. I suppose you're wondering why my son just ran inside?" he asked, his eyes holding a twinkle in them as he grinned.

"Aye, Uncle. He wasn't scowling. I believe he was...smiling."

"You would be right, Lifa. I have invited him along on this trip and he was so excited that he didn't even ask where we were going. I think he went to get his gear together." Then he put his hand on Lifa's shoulder and looked at her seriously. "You'll be sure to keep an eye on him, won't you, niece?"

"Of course, Uncle. Einarr will be in the best of hands."

Lifa was already inwardly groaning, though. She already had a lesser chance of finding any actual danger, not that she'd particularly want to find any anyway, but now she would be sure not to find any this time out because she'd been relegated to babysitting her cousin. He may have only been a year younger than she was, but he had always been there when she'd gone exploring. It hadn't changed at all since they'd gotten older. If anything it had gotten worse, especially with her uncle taking her out adventuring with him and Jax. Now they would be adding Einarr to that mix. She wasn't sure exactly how to feel about that. She knew she should be happy for him, he was finally getting to do what he'd been wanting to do ever since she'd first gone out with Fjolnar and Jax two years ago, but she couldn't help feeling bothered by it. When he reappeared outside thirty minutes later, Einarr was wearing a backpack, a sword his father had given him a year ago on his belt, and a smile on his face that was wider than any she'd ever seen. Shaking her head, she had to smile as well. She could remember how it felt to be invited to go out adventuring for the first time.

"Meeko! Come boy," Lifa called to the dog and stopped when she saw him walk out of the stable. Frowning, she walked to the dog and knelt before him, hugging him tightly. "Oh Meeko, I'm so sorry, boy. Here, I've got a different job for you this time. How about you stay here and take care of my Aunties, hmm? Keep them safe and away from harm. We'll do all right. There's four of us, five with Tilly. Be a good boy, take care of them, Meeko," Lifa said as she stood up and walked toward where the horses were located.

She hadn't realized how aged Meeko had gotten until that moment when he'd emerged from the stable with a limp. She knew that if she asked the dog would follow her to the ends of the earth, but she couldn't do that. Meeko was her father's dog and she wouldn't be responsible for his death should anything happen to him. No, best he stay at home. Besides, Fjolnar would feel safer leaving Iddra if he knew that they were safe. She knew this, which was why she'd told the dog to stay and guard them. Meeko was no slouch, and he should be able to handle himself regardless of the danger they faced on this journey, but he would feel better if he stayed home. Perhaps that was what her aunts felt like in regards to her. It did explain why they wept so much as they left. Shaking that feeling away, she focused on the job at hand which was getting Matilda saddled and ready to leave. She patted the mare's neck as she seemed antsy, but that was normal when they were getting ready to leave. She did look around, though, and spotted a dark form in the woods. She narrowed her eyes and wondered what the wolf was doing. Why did it stalk them so? Was he just hoping to get her alone so he could kill her? She wasn't sure, but she went to tighten the girth on Tilly's saddle and when she looked again the wolf was gone. Shrugging, she finished with Tilly and then went to see if Einarr needed help with Hafix, a gelding they'd gotten a few years ago.

"So, you're getting to come along? How did Aunt Iddra take it?" she asked him, a brow arched as she leaned back on the rail, arms crossed over her chest. Purple eyes bore into him as if they could see his soul.

"Not well, but I just told her that Papa said I could go. She went into her room to cry. I feel bad, sure, but I ain't passin this opportunity up. 'Sides, someone's gotta keep you outta trouble, Lifa."

"Oh, right, and I suppose that's you? Fat chance of that happening. I'll be the one keeping YOU out of trouble, Einarr."

"Whatever. I'll be pullin my own way. I don't need you babysittin me."

"That's fine with me. I didn't want to babysit you anyway. I am just doing what Uncle Fjolnar told me to."

"Don't you have to make sure Tilly's all set or somethin?"

"Already done. Unlike you, we've done this before."

Then she smiled sweetly and turned away, pushing off the rail and walking over to the mare. She untied her from the rail and led her away before mounting up into the saddle and walking around a bit. She was always anxious on the day they left, but it usually calmed down again the further they went. As she had gotten older, Fjolnar and Jax had allowed her to journey further and further from home. Though this would be the longest trip she had ever taken with her uncles. Six hours and they would be going to a bandit hideout, undoubtedly to clear it out. She looked over at Einarr and smiled.

"Come on, runt! Let's go!"

Her cousin merely grunted and then mounted up as did her uncles and then they were on their way. She did look back and wave at her aunts and other cousins, as well as Meeko, as they rode away, but nothing would ever hold her back. She wanted to do this, she had been training for two long years to do this. She may not have an army to fight with, as her father had, but she still wanted to get out there and explore the country she was a part of. The parts of Skyrim that she had seen were amazing. Windhelm was back to being a thriving metropolis with the end of the war so she often went there with Auntie Iddra or Auntie Kenna to get what they needed, but sometimes she had been allowed to go alone. It was those days she looked forward to shopping. She was able to go at her own pace and look at what she wanted to look at. Within the last year or so, Froka had been taking an extra step in an attempt to be her "mother figure". As much as Lifa resisted, it just seemed to drive Froka on to try harder. She did have to admit to having a soft spot for her little brother, though. Hulgar was an adorable child, even if he was stubborn as a mule. More than once Hulgar had tried to play with her bow and she would tell him "no" but all that would do was start a tantrum that would go on until she gave him a sweet roll. Thankfully, however, the boy was outgrowing the tantrum stage. He was nine years old now and had been learning how to forge from Hermir, who'd remained at Kynesgrove after Grim had gone to fight in the war and subsequently disappeared. Having a skill to learn seems to have given her brother a new outlook on life.

The ride to Whiterun, which was where they would have lunch Uncle Fjolnar told her, was relatively uneventful. Nothing more than a few wolves which were swiftly dealt with by the five of them. At least it wasn't raining, something that Lifa was pleased about. She really didn't want to trek through the rain. It was never pleasant. Today, though, it was merely foggy in the morning as they rode out, but as the sun rose the fog burned away and the rest of the trip to Whiterun was easy and sunny. As they rode, she listened to her uncles converse ahead of her. She rode beside Einarr and more than once she caught him looking at her, to which she responded with a classic sticking out of her tongue and then ignoring him. He could really be annoying, even when he wasn't saying anything. She knew how excited he must be, she remembered her first time riding out, but because of that she also knew how nervous he must have been. Perhaps that was why he was looking at her. Because she'd done all this before, he must wonder if she had any tips for him. She looked back at him again with a brow raised.

"Listen, when we are out on the road with Uncle Fjolnar and Uncle Jax, you just have to remember to listen to whatever they tell you. If they say get down, you drop to your belly. Immediately. No arguments. Got it?"

"What? Oh, yeah. Papa already told me that. Unlike you, I know how to follow directions," Einarr said with a scowl.

"Oh shut up. That happened one time! You can't seriously be holding that against me?"

"I might not, but Mama does. She doesn't say so, but I know she does. I was laid up for three months 'cause of that."

"That was four years ago! I said I was sorry," Lifa said with a sigh and looked at Tilly's reins as they rode along in silence.

She remembered that day well. She was ten years old and she had gone exploring, as she often did, but this time she ended up surprising a bear who was munching on a beehive. She'd turned and run, remembering too late that Einarr was always following her and since she'd run off, he would be in danger. She'd returned to him, but by then the bear had already found her cousin and swatted him. At least she'd stopped the bear from killing Einarr. She had picked up a big rock and thrown it at the beast. At which point both Matilda and Meeko showed up and put the bear down while she picked up her cousin and ran home with him in her arms.

"Hey, if you'd followed directions back then, Einarr, you wouldn't have been there in the first place. How about that?" She smiled smugly, pleased with herself for thinking of that.

"Yeah, well... Damn it! Whatever. Fact is I know how to listen now."

"Good, make sure you remember that." She winked and then looked around at their surroundings before listening to her uncles again.

They were discussing the best ways to approach the bandits and since she was the archer in the group, kept back out of danger, most of the time, she was curious about their plans. Normally only when they had cleared things was she allowed ahead, her skills brought into play for long range shots. She was very skilled with her bow and almost always hit the target she was aiming at. She wasn't sure how she managed it, just that she did. She heard Einarr's voice and looked at him, shaking her head to refocus on him.

"What?"

"I said," he told her with an exasperated sigh, "that I was surprised that Papa invited me to come along. It was just a few days ago when he told me I needed to work on my one-handed skills."

"Oh, well, perhaps he thought you were ready after all. You have improved from when you started. Surely he's seen that and has decided to give you a real world test. You'll have to just make sure to not freeze up." She pulled her bottom lip between her teeth as she remembered her first time out. "Did he ever tell you about my first trip out? I had a wolf in my sights and I froze. I couldn't move. I couldn't let the arrow go and I couldn't lower the bow. I was frozen in place with the bow drawn and arrow ready. The wolf looked up and then jumped away. I remember that wolf. It was gray and had two color eyes. One brown, one blue. I thought at the time it was the most interesting thing I had ever seen and figured that was why I couldn't kill it. I don't know, really, I never saw that wolf again."

"Wow, no, Papa never told me that story. I thought you'd always been unmoved by anything, Lifa. You are very brave," Einarr said to her, his cheeks coloring slightly as he looked away from her and down at his hands.

Lifa arched her brow as she watched him blush and look away from her. Then she lowered them and shook her head. He was her cousin, that was all. What an odd thing for him to say about her. Usually they were arguing back and forth about this or that. She set that out of her mind as they arrived at the Whiterun stables. She was saved from saying anything back to him by unsaddling Matilda and giving her something to eat and drink before going to her uncles and finding a place to sit so they could eat lunch. Einarr was mysteriously missing, but since Uncle Fjolnar didn't seem concerned, she put it out of her mind. He was there when they finished eating and went to saddle the horses back up. By the time they had remounted and gotten back on the road, she had put his words and actions out of her mind and started to focus on the task at hand. She felt more excited this time than ever before and she knew why now. After consulting the map, she noticed they would be close to where the final battle of the civil war took place, close to where her father had disappeared. Perhaps she would find a clue as to what happened to him. Most likely she wouldn't, but she had to keep hoping she might one day know what happened. It took them another two hours from Whiterun to reach the cave where the bandits were supposedly holed up and neither she nor Einarr were all that concerned with talking much at all. They dismounted and secured the horses a distance from the cave and then sneaked up to it. There were no bandits outside, and there was no telling how many were inside, but her uncles were confident that this was the place and there were indeed bandits inside. Lifa nodded as she was told to stay in the rear and watch Einarr, then they entered the cave stealthily.

The first impression that Lifa got from the cave as they entered it was one of dampness and cold, not that she felt it much, but she knew it was there. Instantly male voices came to her ears and she shrank to a crouch, her bow out and ready as her eyes surveyed the area ahead. She spotted the first bandit sitting near an open firepit and looked to be doing nothing more than just relaxing. Perhaps these bandits would be easier to defeat than she'd originally thought. Maybe even more than her uncles had thought, considering they'd relegated both her and Einarr to stay at the mouth of the cave, hidden of course, while they crept on ahead. She threw her cousin a glance and saw him focused on the bandit they could see. There was no telling how many others were in the cave, but surely not just the one. She could remember that feeling well of being along for the first time. Unfortunately, she could also remember the first time her arrows had killed another. It had been a necessity, sure, but that doesn't matter much when you're lying in bed trying to sleep. Just the idea that you actually killed someone.  
Her gaze returned to the bandit as her uncles were almost upon him. She pulled the bowstring back, preparing the arrow to fire if needed. She'd learned well enough by now not to fire into a melee fight as more than once her arrows had struck Fjolnar or Jax's arms when she'd been trying to help. It happened twice and after that, she decided that she wouldn't try to help by shooting the person they were fighting, but rather keep her eyes open for any other enemies that she might be able to keep away from them. That was what she was doing now, especially as her uncles reached the man and a fight, brief though it was, ensued. As she had expected, the noise drew another bandit out from around the corner and she let the arrow fly. It arced beautifully, even in the cave, and thudded into the bandit's chest. The force of which knocked the man backwards with a groan. Her smile was beaming as her uncles turned to the fallen man and quickly put him down for good. She looked at Einarr as the adults disappeared from sight.  
"Come on, Einarr. We need to get closer," she said and nudged her cousin.  
"Uh, oh, right," he replied and moved away from their hiding spot.  
Einarr couldn't believe it. She'd just let the arrow go, just like that, and hit the man. He was still stunned as he passed by the first man, then the second, hearing a fight below. As he looked, he could see his father and Jax fighting another bandit, though this one looked stronger and better armored than the others. On the ground lay the body of a third bandit, dead. He heard Lifa pull back on the bow and then nothing. He looked at her, but she was merely holding the string back, ready to fire.  
"Why aren't you helpin?" he whispered to her as they watched the fight going on below.  
"Because, cousin, if I didn't hit the bandit, I could hit your father or Jax. That wouldn't be good, would it?" she replied in a whisper.  
"No, I guess it wouldn't. Ugh, I ain't gonna be able to do anythin back here with you."  
"Oh really? Tell me how you really feel, Einarr," she said sarcastically.  
"You know what I mean, Lifa. How am I gonna get better with my sword if I never get to use it?"  
"You'll be fine, Einarr. Believe me, you don't forget the people you've killed. They haunt me whenever I sleep."  
"Really?"  
"Aye, but when I dream of the white wolf I find that I feel much better. I'm not sure what it is, but it's a feeling I get when I wake up. Like everything that has happened doesn't matter."  
"It probably won't bother me as much since I ain't a girl," Einarr whispered with a smug grin, but it went away when Lifa punched his shoulder.  
"Shut up, runt! It's not because I'm a girl that it affects me, you arse."  
That said, she watched her uncles as they moved around, searching for any other trouble, then signaled to them with the 'all clear'. She left Einarr on the platform and made her way down the stairs. She stood upright from the crouch and looked around before gazing at Fjolnar. She really didn't understand how he could have sired a jerk like Einarr. Honestly, she wasn't sure she would be able to put up with him during this trip. She brushed a bit of dirt off her armor and smiled at her uncles.  
"That seemed to go rather easy, didn't it?" she asked them a tad nervously.  
"It did, Lifa, but as far as we can tell there are no other bandits here. Einarr, come along with me and I'll show you what we do after we have taken out our enemies."  
Lifa watched as her uncle took her cousin off to the first bandit's body to go through the finer points of looting. He'd already taught her this when he'd brought her along the first time. Since she didn't need to be taught what to do, she began to look around the "rooms" and see what she could find. She went up to the wooden platform where there were a few tables and started to sort through it all. Jax, she noticed, stayed down below going through the two dead bodies there as well as the chests and crates that were located around there. Her hands came upon a smooth leather journal and she stopped for a moment. Opening the book, she read the words that were written there and her eyebrows rose with each sentence. These people must have been overachievers if they thought just four of them could take down a mammoth. Shaking her head, she held the book up for her uncle.  
"Uncle, this says they've been attempting to poach mammoths. I'm sure the giants aren't happy about that."  
She had seen enough giants in her short lifetime to know to avoid them, and their hairy livestock. Mammoths were just that, mammoth. While most of the time they were easygoing and unaggressive, if you caught them on a bad day they would seriously mess you up. And the giants absolutely hated when anyone messed with their mammoths. Of course, all of this was just what she'd read in books and seen from a distance. She and her uncles knew better than to go near a giant's camp and almost always steered clear of them. She found the mammoths interesting, but not so much that she wanted to get up close and personal with them.  
Fjolnar came back up the stairs and took the journal away from Lifa, reading it. Jax, too, came up to join him and read as well. Einarr looked as white as a sheet and she had to wonder if he would be able to handle all of this after all. Course, not having been able to see her face, she wasn't sure if she looked like that her first time, too, or not. She supposed she would give her cousin the benefit of the doubt and say she probably did.  
"Aye, look here Jax." Her uncle pointed at a page of the journal. "Says they've been raiding Talking Stone Camp. I know of that giant camp. You're right, Lifa, I'm sure those giants are not happy about it. Looks like we've helped more than just the Jarl by taking these bandits out."  
Einarr was only half listening at the moment. He was trying to find a corner to sit in to let the feeling of nausea pass, but it wasn't easy. He definitely did not want Lifa to see him puking his guts out over a few dead bodies, not after all of his boasting. To get away from it all, he walked up a hallway, away from the group, to another room. Inside here were more crates and a large chest. He wasn't thinking about looting anything or he would have done so, but he had a very good memory so he would tell his father after he felt better. As he leaned against a wall, his hand touched something and he looked up to see a chain pull. He thought that was odd, but instead of telling anyone else he pulled it himself. The wall slid away and revealed a passageway. He paused for a moment, but all he could hear was his father, Jax, and Lifa talking. He went into a crouch and sneaked up the short passageway. As he stood on the cliff, he looked down and saw the first "room" they'd been in. This must have been an escape route in case they were breached. His eyes slid over to the two adults and Lifa, sighing. If only he could be like her. He was sure Papa wanted someone who didn't get queasy from looking at a dead body. Surely Lifa never felt that way. Shaking his head of these thoughts, he put a smile on his face as the nausea had dissipated.  
"Papa! I found their escape route. Didn't help them much today, though."  
"Einarr, be careful. Come here, we've got things to discuss," Fjolnar told his son, then went back to the journal they were reading.  
Einarr narrowed his eyes, but knew better than to disobey. Especially since Lifa had been on her best behavior. Except for punching him in the arm. It still smarted. He turned and headed back to the chamber he'd found the chain pull in and took a breath. Now that he took the time to look around, he decided to check the chest on his own. He went to it and with a bit of effort lifted the lid. There were a few things that he picked up and put into his backpack before he noticed another journal. He grabbed it and opened the cover, expecting some stupid bandit to be writing in it. What he found was something else entirely and he wasn't sure what to do about it. He swallowed and shook his head, deciding to wait until they were back home before saying anything about it. Better that way. He put it into his backpack and shut the chest's lid. He gave the chamber one more look and then left, heading back to the group. He would see what was in the journal before he spoke to his father or Lifa about it.  
"Ah, Einarr, there you are. Come, son, and read what this man was writing about," Fjolnar said, motioning for Einarr to stand beside him.  
"All right, Papa. Comin," he said, but he was nervous. Did that journal say anything about the author of the book in his possession? He hoped it didn't, but there was only one way to find out. He stood next to his father and looked at Lifa's face. Surely it didn't say anything or she would not be so calm, right? He looked at the book and started to read, feeling more and more relaxed as he scanned the words. Nothing was there.  
"So, do you think there is another group nearby, Papa?"  
"Aye, I do, son. My feeling is that they're out attempting another raid on those mammoths and will return here when they're done. That said, we'll be setting up an ambush for them."  
Einarr wasn't sure he was ready for that, but he knew that if his father was tasked with something, he always finished it completely. No half-assing anything here. He just hoped there wouldn't be too many more who came back here. He'd seen more than his fair share of dead bodies for one day. He enjoyed exploring, but he didn't really like the death part.  
"Come on, Einarr. We'll hide on that ledge you found. That was a good idea. Course, it'll backfire on the bandits when they get back, but it works out for us."  
"Great," he said with less enthusiasm than his face showed.  
The two teenagers moved to the ledge and hid themselves. Fjolnar and Jax hid on the platform facing the mouth of the cave, where they could easily fire at the bandits as they came in. Lifa was looking forward to being able to help from her vantage point, so she had her bow ready. Now it was just a matter of sitting and waiting for something to happen. Einarr thought about the journal in his backpack again, but decided to keep it out of sight for now. Especially since they were waiting for more bandits to come into the cave. Lifa sensed that something was up with her cousin, but figured it was just the fact that he had been put into a situation he had never been in before. She had no idea what he was hiding or she would have been angry with him for keeping it hidden from her.  
It took a while, another hour, before the rest of the bandits staggered into the cave. However, when they did it was apparent that their mammoth hunting hadn't gone so well and it was much easier for Fjolnar, Jax, and Lifa to take them out. Einarr simply watched, since he wasn't all that good with a bow and wasn't about to go down there to fight the bandits with his sword. He'd realized that the idea of killing someone was a lot different than actually doing it. It was definitely easier to think it than to do it. Within ten minutes the rest of the bandits were dead and Fjolnar and Jax had looted their bodies. Lifa didn't seem to be too interested in the looting part of things, so Einarr stuck with her instead of seeing the other dead bodies.  
"Lifa, does it ever get easier?" he asked her as they stood apart from the adults.  
"Does what ever get easier? The killing of bandits?"  
"I mean everythin. The killin, the lootin, all of it. I just can't stop thinkin that these bandits have families. Or rather, that they might have families. You know?"  
"Oh, aye, I know what you mean. I've been doing this for two years, Einarr. It gets easier, believe me." Though the faces never quite leave your mind, she added silently. "Come on, let's go outside and get some air and bring the horses closer to the cave entrance. Now that we have all the bandits, we don't have to worry about being seen."  
She walked away from her uncles and toward the mouth of the cave, soon disappearing from view. Einarr stood there for a moment more before he followed her out of the cave. He stood for a moment as he exited into the sunlight and shook his head to clear the glare. Then he followed Lifa to the horses. He supposed he would have to give Lifa a break since she had been doing this for two years and he had only just started. Perhaps she had felt this way back then, too. They led the four horses back to the cave and stood there with them for a moment.  
"So, what do you think we'll do after this? Papa said we would probably be gone a week or so."  
"Oh, once Uncle Fjolnar and Uncle Jax are done inside, we'll most likely ride over to the giant camp now that we know what was going on here."  
"The giant camp? You mean actually gettin near them? Won't they kill us?"  
"Oh Einarr, they won't kill us once your Papa tells them about the bandits we killed. You and I will probably stay a fair distance from them, though, with Uncle Jax. To be safe."  
"Good. I don't want wanna be too close to those things. I ain't seen one in person before, but I can only imagine how big it is."  
"Aye, they're pretty big, but Uncle Jax says that as long as you leave their mammoths alone and you don't get too close to their camp you'll be fine."  
Einarr shivered at her words and shook his head, unsure of this whole plan. Then another thought came to him and he looked at her.  
"So after the giant's camp where will we go?"  
"Hmm? Oh, yeah, well since the Jarl had put a bounty on these bandits, we'll have to head to Solitude," Lifa said with a look on her face that showed distaste, "and talk to the steward there so we can get our reward. Sometimes we adventure for money and there are people who do so exclusively. Uncle Fjolnar and Uncle Jax don't do that all the time, only occasionally. Most of the other time is spent just riding from place to place."  
Einarr listened to her and thought it was definitely an interesting life, to always be on the road and taking on bounty hunts and such. Though he wasn't sure it was for him, the idea of it made it sound like something better than it really was. He could see why so many would follow that path. He had to admit that he was afraid of killing another person, but obviously Lifa had already. He couldn't be wimpier than her, so he would have to just get over it.  
Fjolnar and Jax came out of the cave a short time later and as Jax went to the horses, Fjolnar went to Einarr and smiled at the boy.  
"You're doing really well, Einarr. I hope you understand why I'm reluctant to put you in front of something like these bandits. If we come upon a wolf or two, we'll let you and Lifa take them out, how's that sound?"  
"Sure Papa. I think I'd rather take down an animal than a person anyway." Then he thought that might make him sound weak. "But I mean, if I gotta kill someone to save myself or someone else then I'd do it."  
"I know you would, son. Let's hope it doesn't get to that point, eh?" Fjolnar chuckled and hugged Einarr, then went over to his horse.  
Once everyone was mounted on their horses once more, they moved out and away from the cave. Away from Solitude first to speak with the giants and let them know that the bandits responsible for attacking their mammoths were dead. They would head to Solitude after. Einarr and Lifa stayed far from Talking Stone Camp with Jax while Fjolnar rode closer to the camp to talk to the giants. Einarr almost held his breath as he watched his father go toward the camp, but when he wasn't attacked he relaxed and just watched. It seemed as if they lived primitively, with a huge campfire in the middle of their camp. The giants themselves wore very little which lent him to believe they lived primitively as well. It only took Fjolnar a half hour to talk to the giants and then they were on their way to Solitude.  
Lifa looked at Einarr as they rode and decided that he would do all right. Perhaps if she stopped thinking of him like that little kid who used to follow her around everywhere she went they could actually get things done. Already she was seeing him in a different light, as a person not just an annoyance. The way he'd gone pale at the cave made her realize that this was all new to him while it was old hat to her. She had to adjust to having someone who knew less than she did along with her. She didn't think that she would be able to stop herself from bragging about things that bothered him and didn't bother her anymore, but she would definitely try to teach him everything that she knew personally from now on. Of course, it was all things that she'd learned from Fjolnar and Jax, but still, it would help him.  
As they approached Solitude, Lifa felt increasingly more anxious about the city. She had never liked coming here and she couldn't help but wonder if it had something to do with her father. He had disappeared here, after all. In everyone's eyes but hers, it was where he had died.  
"Uncle? Can I stay at the stables and help Blaise with the horses?" she asked, not wanting to go into the city.  
"Sure, Lifa. Just don't run off anywhere, all right?" Fjolnar said softly, then turned back to Jax. Einarr looked at her.  
"Lifa, are you all right?"  
"I'm fine, Einarr. I just don't like Solitude and Uncle Fjolnar knows it. Besides, Blaise and I are friends. I'll be fine. Go on, experience the city for the first time. It's been repaired and updated from the war. Get me a taffy treat while you're there."  
"If you're sure, Lifa. Who's this Blaise?"  
"Easy, cousin. Blaise is the man who runs the stables since Geimund passed away a few years ago. We both like horses, so we have a lot to talk about. Don't worry about me. Better get going." She motioned to her uncles who were riding up the hill to Solitude.  
Einarr gave a grunt, then nodded to her before turning Hafix and urging the gelding up the hill to catch up with his father and Jax. Lifa watched them go, then dismounted from Tilly and led her into the stableyard. Immediately she spotted Blaise standing against the stable wall and she had to stop for a moment. It had been almost a year since she had last seen the young man and he had certainly grown up during that time. He was no longer a tall teenager, he was a muscular twenty year old man. She swallowed to wet her suddenly dry throat and stood stupidly holding Matilda's reins until the mare snorted and pushed against her shoulder.  
"Oh..." She shook her head and stepped forward with the mare in tow. "Hey Blaise!"  
"Why hello there, Lifa. How are you today?" Blaise asked her with a grin on his face.  
"You uh, remember me?" she asked, feeling her face heating up and lowered her head so he couldn't see the blush that was covering her face.  
"Of course I do. I don't know anyone who could forget you, Lifa," he said as he pushed off the wall and stepped up to her. "How is Tilly doing lately? Not feeling lame at all, is she?"  
"What? Oh, no. She's just been eager to get back out on the road. Whenever she's out in the pen, all she wants is to get right back out there again." She leaned against the mare, her violet eyes hooded as she peeked up at Blaise. "How are things here?"  
"Slow. Ever since the war ended there just hasn't been as much traffic. Though I'm always happy to see you, Lifa," he told her, his hand reaching up to her face. Lifa tensed at first, then her eyes shot up to look at him. "You've certainly grown into yourself."  
She blushed again, unable to say anything and instantly felt a flush throughout her body instead of just her face. She couldn't believe that a single touch could do such a thing, but there it was. She grinned at him and then leaned against his hand. She felt his thumb tracing the lavender leaf mark on her cheek and swallowed.  
"You have, too, Blaise," she said, her words whispered as if she couldn't speak.  
Then before she knew what was happening he was dipping his head and touching his lips to her own. She froze, unsure what to do, but it wasn't awful. After a moment, he pulled back and smiled at her.  
"Was that your first kiss, sweetheart?" When she nodded, he moved his other hand to her waist and pulled her closer, snugging their bodies together. "The first of many, I hope," he said just before he reclaimed her lips.  
This time his tongue moved out and slid across the seam of her own lips. When she gasped, he slipped it inside to touch against her own. They stood there in the stableyard, embracing and kissing one another before Blaise was suddenly pulling away from her. Lifa stood there for a moment, her beating heart attempting to return to a normal rhythm. During this time, she absently heard grunts, groans, scuffling and thuds, but her mind was racing as she realized she had just experienced her first kiss with a very handsome Blaise. When she opened her eyes again, she saw Blaise on the ground, clutching his nose. Tilly tossed her head and she looked over to see Einarr standing in a fighting stance, his fists still up, one of his knuckles bleeding. At first she thought that was odd, but then everything slid into place and she realized that Einarr had just been beating Blaise up.  
"Einarr! What have you done?!"  
"What have I... Lifa, he was takin advantage!"  
"He was not! Uh, at least I don't think he was. Besides, I could have taken care of him myself if I had wanted him to stop. You didn't need to get involved!"  
"I was savin your reputation, Lifa!"  
"It's not yours to save, Einarr!"  
Einarr stood there, staring at her as if she'd grown another head for a moment before he glanced at Blaise once more, kicked dirt at the man, then turned away and walked off. He had been doing her a damned favor, at least she could thank him for it!  
"Are you all right, Blaise?" she asked him as she held her hand out to help him up, which he ignored and got up on his own. She couldn't believe Einarr had done that.  
"I'm fine, Lifa. Look, why don't you just leave Tilly here and take a walk, eh? I need some time to clean up."  
"Oh, well, uh, okay. If you say so. I'll be back soon." Lifa gave him another "I'm sorry" look and then left the stableyard, spotting Einarr and following him. They needed to talk.

Lifa caught up to him down near the docks and stopped him with a touch to his arm. Without a word, she turned and walked to a rock and sat down. Einarr followed her and sat down beside her. He let out a sigh as he flexed his right hand, wincing in pain. Lifa rolled her eyes at him and shook her head, then reached out and took his hand in her own. With her other hand, she pulled out a rag and wiped the blood that was still on his hand.  
"I should slap you for what you did back there, Einarr," she said as she cleaned the cuts on his hand.  
"Well I, uh... I thought I was helpin, Lifa," he told her, his eyes moving back and forth from her face to his hand.  
"Aye, I figured that out, Einarr, but I... I had it under control." She couldn't help but remember the feeling of Blaise's lips on her own. It had been her first kiss after all. "If it happens again, just wait for me to ask for help, okay?"  
"All right, Lifa," Einarr said to her, but he wasn't sure he would be able to control it if it happened again. He hadn't even known what he was doing until he'd already done it.  
The pair went silent again as Lifa cleaned his hand and then held hers over it. He watched curiously as she seemed to be chanting words and then a warm glow appeared over his hand and it felt better. Healing magic? When had Papa taught her that? He hadn't recalled her talking about magic at all, but he supposed it was a good skill to learn. He flexed his hand again, the pain was gone and the cuts healing. He tilted his head and gazed at her.  
"Thanks."  
"It's nothing, Einarr. It was the least I could do after you hurt yourself defending me. Wrongly, but you were still defending me."  
Einarr cleared his throat and looked away, feeling the blush creeping up on him and he tried to get himself under control again before he turned to look at her once more.  
"Let's forget about it, cousin. We have more to think of. Like what we might do next," Lifa said as she looked out at the sea.  
"What do you want, Lifa? Not in the next day or two, but in the future. What do you want?" he asked her softly, following her gaze to the water, then back to her as he waited for her reply.  
"I don't know, Einarr. I mean I suppose I want to find my father. I know he's out there. He's alive," Lifa said as she turned her head, her eyes finding his own. "I just know it."  
"It's been years, Lifa. Are you so sure that he wants to be found if he is alive? Why would he have stayed away from you for so long?"  
"I don't know. I know everyone thinks he's dead because he would have come back if he were alive, but inside I know that he's alive and I will find him. One day."  
Einarr wished he had her conviction, but he looked down at his feet as he sat on the rock in silence. He was like everyone else, thinking that his uncle had died that day on the battlefield, but after finding the journal in the bandit's cave... Well, now he wasn't so sure anymore. He supposed it could be just someone's imagination or a bandit writing a story, but somehow he didn't think it was. He wondered if this was the time he should show it to his cousin or not. The decision was made for him, however, with the arrival of the adults.  
"Ah, there you two are. Blaise said you'd taken a walk," Fjolnar said softly and then stood next to Einarr.  
"So, which one of you put the bleed on Blaise?" Jax asked with a crooked grin as he leaned on a fence post.  
"That would be Einarr, Uncle Jax. Honestly, I can't deal with boys at all," Lifa said and stood up off the rock, wiping the dirt off her backside. "Are we ready to go?" she asked, trying to get the focus off Blaise's battered nose. Unfortunately, no one wanted to let it go just yet.  
"Well, I had to stick up for her, Papa. He was kissin and holdin her much too close. What else should I have done?" Einarr asked his father with a smug smile at Lifa.  
"Wait, what?" Fjolnar stared hard at Einarr, then looked at Lifa with a new light. As a father would a daughter who'd disobeyed him.  
"Whoa, are you saying that our little Lifa and Blaise were... Ooompf!" Jax had started to say but was interrupted by an elbow to his ribs. He grunted, but got the picture. He shut up.  
"It wasn't a big deal. Yes, he kissed me and true, he might have been holding me closer than I am used to, but I'm not a little kid anymore! I'm a woman!" she said and stamped her foot on the ground in frustration. "And I don't need HIM fighting my battles for me!"  
She huffed and then turned away to walk back up the hill to the stables once more, but she wasn't sure she could face Blaise right now, so she slowed to a walk and went toward the carriage man instead, wasting time until she was brave enough to deal with seeing the handsome Blaise with a busted nose. She supposed she probably should offer to heal it for him, but the fact that he'd told her to take a walk afterward really hurt. It was like he thought she'd put Einarr up to it, which she hadn't. Not even close.  
Einarr, Fjolnar and Jax watched her walk away up the hill and stood dumbfounded for a moment. Finally, Jax let out a laugh and before long all three of them were laughing. Not too loud, however, since they didn't want her coming back with that temper of hers. Fjolnar couldn't believe that he'd been so blind, but now he realized that she was right. She wasn't a little girl anymore. She was a young woman and she was bound to have feelings that all women get. He just hadn't expected to feel it in his chest to hear it spoken of. It was like a hand was holding his heart and crushing it. She may have been Grim's daughter, but for the past nine years, she had been his daughter and he had raised her as one of his own. What he felt was a father's pain, the knowledge that his little girl was growing up and would soon leave him to have a family of her own. He cleared his throat of the laughter as he had a single thought. Not with Blaise. The boy was nice enough and at least he had a job and a place to live, but he knew she would never be happy with a man like that. She craved adventure, just as Froka had, and she would need a man who could handle her adventurous nature.  
"Einarr, come on, now. You have to learn, son, that a girl like Lifa will only accept help as a last resort. I had enough time with Grim to know that she takes after her father in that respect. That man had a very hard time asking for help. Just forget what happened today and the two of you can get back to the way things were. No harm done." Fjolnar smiled and hugged his son around the shoulders before letting go. "Come on, Jax, let's get the horses ready. I doubt Lifa's gonna want to go into the stableyard for a bit."  
The two adults made their way back up the hill, leaving Einarr standing near the rock and wondering what to do about Lifa. Should he take his father's advice and let what happened today just go, forget about it? He supposed he could see how that might work, if Lifa was for it also. With that in mind, his thoughts then turned to the journal as he walked up the hill and took a deep breath of the salty air. He knew he needed to tell her about it. He would do so tonight when they stopped to sleep. It was the right thing to do, she had to read it. If it was written by her father, and he had no doubt that it was, she deserved to have it. They might possibly be the last words Helgrim Frost-Blood ever wrote.  
As he reached the top of the hill, he spotted the horses as well as Lifa with his father and Uncle Jax. He looked at the sky and saw that the sun would be setting soon. That meant they would most likely be setting up camp out on the Solitude plains. If they were staying at the inn, they wouldn't have the horses prepared. Given the way Lifa reacted when they'd arrived, he had assumed they weren't sleeping in town. They all mounted up and the adults took the lead, letting Einarr and Lifa to ride beside one another. As they passed the stables, he gave Blaise one more scowling glance before they were past and heading away from Solitude. Blaise looked as if he had tried to look meaner than he was in that moment, but he was forgotten as they rode on.  
Before long they had reached a clearing and stopped the horses. Fjolnar took the canvas and bedrolls off the horses while Jax told the teenagers to go collect what they could for firewood. With a sigh, Lifa walked away from Einarr to search for wood. Einarr followed her at a short distance and chewed on his lower lip. He really wanted to make things better between them, but he wasn't sure how to do that. He knew the journal would either help or hurt his chances because she would either be glad to see anything that was her father's or be upset he had held onto it for even the few hours that he had. With these thoughts running through his mind, he started picking up pieces of wood.  
"Come on, out with it, runt," Lifa demanded, standing in front of him with her arms crossed, her violet eyes dancing with danger.  
Einarr stared at her as if she'd grown a second head. She hadn't said two words to him since she'd stormed off from the docks at Solitude and here she was looking as if she wanted to kill him. He swallowed nervously, but put on a scowl anyway to intimidate.  
"Look, we should get this back to camp so we can have a fire."  
"Right. We'll go back, but then you're gonna tell me what's up with you. I could hear you sighing the whole time we were getting firewood."  
Lifa walked back to the campsite with an armful of wood, as Einarr did as well, and once it was deposited she looked over at him, waiting. Einarr shook his head as he tried to ignore the way she was looking at him as he started a fire in the middle of the site. Fjolnar and Jax were working on setting up tents and bedrolls. Once the fire was lit and was burning well, he stood up and stretched, then walked over to Hafix and opened his saddlebag. Then he pulled out a journal which he brought back to the campfire. Back to Lifa. He sat down next to her, then handed the journal over.  
"Found it at the cave. Figured I'd give it to you when we stopped for the night," he said, a single brow arching as he waited for her reaction.  
Lifa took the book and looked down at it. It was a simple leather cover with a single emblem etched into it, of a wolf's head. She swallowed and then opened it and there on the first page was his name and it brought tears to her eyes. Helgrim Frost-Blood. Her father. Her fingers traced each letter and she looked over at Einarr, pulling her bottom lip between her teeth momentarily.  
"Thank you for giving this to me. I knew it, Einarr. I knew he was alive."  
"Be careful, Lifa. I didn't read it, but who knows what you'll find in there. Be sure you want to know more before you do." He would hate to see her image of her father be tarnished because of things that happened afterward.  
"I'll be careful. Thank you, cousin." Lifa stood up and leaned down, kissing Einarr's cheek before heading off to her newly erected tent where she could lie down and read her father's journal. Tonight she would learn more about what had happened to him. She was sure of it.  
Einarr watched her go and sighed, then put his hand to his cheek for a moment before wiping the kiss off. She confused him so much, but he couldn't ignore her. He just hoped she was all right after reading the journal.


End file.
